Hear Me Out: Why I'm Not So Sure You Should Buy Dragon Age: Legacy.

I don't recall anything this epic being in the game. That's the one I wanted to buy!

God, here I go again. Like the Energizer Bunny riding a broken record or something stupid like that. Four months after the release of Dragon Age 2 and I still feel like I need to bash on it in some way. But you know what? I can't help it. It cannot be helped, and I cannot help it. So, here we go with this week's edition of: I Hate You, Dragon Age 2: I Hate You So Damn Much. (Working title.)

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Hi - this is Buch, I'll be writing in this different font - and I'll be adding my comments to this post, being as I am the only Bioware fan on Earth who enjoyed (parts of) Dragon Age 2.

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Essentially, what I want to say regards the upcoming release of the first real add-on for Dragon Age 2 since its release: "Legacy." Nope, not useless weapons and armor, but an actual story. A story that (as far as I know) partially involves delving into Hawke's family history by way of a Grey Warden prison, which was just fantastic to hear. It's good that we're going to get back to Wardens and darkspawn. You know, since they spent the entirety of DA2 letting you know that, from here on out, we're all just gonna do our darndest to forget that abysmal prequel, Dragon Age: Origins, and all of the emotional investment fans might have tied up in it and get on with our lives.

'Cause that worked out well.

At this point, reeling the Wardens back into the picture and throwing you up against the very-familiar waves of darkspawn seems like a bit of a cop-out, which, I know, is a terrible thing to say after all that criticism. It's a damned if you do, damned if you don't kind of scenario, but whatever.

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This will look I'm interrupting for the sheer sake of it, but - to hell with Darkspawn. As it were. I adored Origins too, way more than the sequel, but after a minimum 40 hours fighting those three or four identical darkspawn sprites, I was utterly sick of them. To me they seem like astonshingly lazy enemies - a literal horde of repeated guys, the big guy and the little guy, who are just... kinda like orcs except they're demons or whatever. Dark-spawn? Yes, that'll do.
I'm going to far now, but I got bored of them pretty fast and I don't want to be fighting them anymore from now on. One the Blight ended, that ought to be the end of the Darkspawn on the surface. I feel that any plot otherwise would cheapen the Warden's accomplishment.
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But as per the inefficient title of this entry: I'm really not so sure people should be buying "Legacy." Even if you liked it. Lemme explain. There are two types of people this add-on is targeting: the people who liked the game and the people that were critical. The fans and the critics. It's doing this by expanding upon a part Hawke's story (a part that was never once referenced in the game, but whatever), appealing to nostalgia for the prequel, and attempting to right some of the wrongs that were in the main game. Okay? Okay.

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Okay. Honestly I'd call myself a critic too. I really liked the first two thirds, but I don't think I'll play through them again, not for that payoff.
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The fans probably won't care in any case. As long as this is continuing Hawke's story, they'll be content, which isn't a bad thing. If you like it, you like it. The critics might like that they'll be getting back into the fight with the good ol' darkspawn, and that they'll be exploring Grey Warden history to boot. They also might like that some of the main(ish) criticisms from the main game have been addressed, as in you won't be bogged down fighting off waves of enemies, and the dungeon will actually be brand new. That is to say, the multi-purpose dungeon from DA2 won't be making an appearance.

Upon first glance, that doesn't sound like an unreasonably bad add-on. Given the backlash that arose after DA2's release, this was probably the most logical route to take toward building up the franchise's damaged fanbase. But I'm here to convince you not to buy this thing, and I've already rambled on awhile, so let me lay down my case before I forget what I'm doing here.

BioWare Dislikes You Right Now

This is directed at both the fans and the critics. BioWare doesn't seem to be very fond of its own fanbase right now. Hyperbole? Exaggeration? Both?! Probably, but it's the only way I can explain what happened to DA2 and the post-release reaction. The game was not finished. It doesn't matter how much you liked it, because it doesn't change the fact that BioWare delivered fans of DA:O half of a game.

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Two thirds of a game.
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When I played Dragon Age: Origins for the first time, it freaked me right the hell out. I had the difficulty set too high, and I hadn't played a real tactics-based RPG since the Knights of the Old Republic series was still new. In my mad rush to get through the game, I literally skipped over everything outside of the main quest. I just couldn't bring myself to do it, because I got my ass handed to me more times than a... donkey farmer? Anyway, I rushed through the thing. How long did rushing through DA:O take me? 33 hours!

With DA2, I told myself that I wasn't going to make the same mistake. I was going for full completion this time around, and I pretty much accomplished this. After doing every single sidequest available (minus the high dragon fight), I finished the game in just under 30 hours, if I remember correctly. Try completing everything in DA:O in under 30 hours; that just ain't gonna happen.

DA:O had several cities from opposite ends of Ferelden, each with their own histories that spanned thousands of years. Histories that the game allowed you to explore and influence. DA2 has one city that doesn't change in ten years, the history of which is about as deep as my old above-ground pool. So, the content not only diminished, but it also got weaker. You could argue otherwise, but I'm not gonna let ya.

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Plus Kirkwall only had one pub. And its Elven Alienage consisted of one room with a tree on-loan from a Dreamcast game, thus making the city less diverse and worse-drawn than Denerim - one of several large locations in the first game. This time I don't even want to argue otherwise.
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So, why would BioWare, after delivering a product to such acclaim, turn around sell you a sequel that took a fifth of the time to develop in comparison to its prequel, with much less content? The only obvious answer being: because they knew fans would buy it blind. Why else would they offer a special edition of the game that could only be obtained by pre-ordering it three months in advance? Not only that, but the embargo on useful information about the game was lifted only a month before it was actually released, which I would say pretty much displays a lack of confidence on their part that DA2 would sell well if they had showed it off earlier.

So, BioWare sold us an inferior product, and it's very likely that they knew what they were doing all the while.

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Actually I would put-in here that Dragon Age 2 was never intended to be an inferior product. For whatever reason, Bioware just prefer these Mass Effect dialogue wheels now and their named, voiced protagonists, and they clearly tried at first. If they hadn't wanted this game to be good, they wouldn't have made it so different to their usual style, taken those risks. I suppose I could be wrong and Bioware could have used Kirkwall for the simple reason of saving space, or the political conflict instead of an enemy for the reason of time constraints, but I can't see it. Not to that extent.

This is the core of my defence right here. Not all the while, Knight. They tried to make this one a little bit different from their usual 'band of heroes led by the last-of-the-whoever off to save the world from the monsters by visiting four places' schtick. They tried to create this soap-opera feel with characters who have homes, jobs and secret agendas - and hell, I loved Aveline and Varric, just for their conversation.
And moreover, they were trying to set up some kind of trilogy or series or something with Hawke. They failed utterly, and it's clear that they rushed the game's finale in a manner than I call insulting. But I think they started this thing with big ideas.

This is all I've got.
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The fans complained (many of them, anyway, if the official forums are any indication), and the response on their part was pretty harsh/hilarious, all things considered. Never once did they answer for all the blatantly-cut corners, such as the multi-purpose dungeon, the-city-that-never-changes, not being able to equip party members, or how it's always sunny in Darktown. Things that were so applauded in DA:O, but failed to make an appearance in any form. I would also throw the lackluster ending and most of the party members onto that pyre, but meh.

But it doesn't matter, because they knew we would buy it. And I did! I got the "BioWare Signature Edition" and played through the extra, reskinned multi-purpose dungeon. For a signature edition, no, it wasn't representative of what BioWare is still (I hope) capable of. And then here comes "Legacy."

Even if you liked DA2, it was not the game you could've gotten. TES IV: Oblivion sold very well, but I don't think any of us are expecting Skyrim to be Call of Duty with swords. DA:O sold very well (not Oblivion well, but very well regardless), and I wasn't for one moment thinking that DA2 would become a super-linear God of War wannabe. There were redeeming features, yes, but then again, Two Worlds had some, too. So, yeah.

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There is an argument that Mass Effect 2 was just Gears of War with dialogue trees.
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By purchasing "Legacy," you're telling EA and BioWare that how they handled DA2, both before and after, was okay, and that it'll be perfectly acceptable to do something similar with the inevitable Dragon Age 3. Again, even if you liked it, it doesn't change the fact that BioWare tried to screw with you for quick money. When someone tries to steal your wallet, you don't give them $20 for the effort.

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One final note from me - that's a very interesting name they went for. Dragon Age 2 Legacy. I wonder if Bioware are trying to save exactly that? Well if so, fair enough, but.... Jesus guys, that game's ending really sucked. $20 or the Sterling equivalent seems like a lot of money. I might have paid that price for some kind of patch that replaces the third act of the story with one that makes a modicum of sense. But not to go fight freaking darkspawn. I can do that in the Deep Roads. Or in Origins. Or my nightmares.

Even I won't be buying this one unless there's something special about it. Bioware can do special with DLC, but they have to really care about it. They can do crap too.

Having looked at the adverts for the new DA2 DLC... nothing stands out. It looks distinctly like a dungeon with some nonsense about Hawke's incredibly dull family thrown in, and a nice new sword. I'm not calling you a liar, Bioware - and I'm really looking forward to whatever new games you put out - but I think DA2 is buried now. So start again, hey.
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Whew, hopefully that''ll be the end of these rants, eh? =D

Dragon Age 2's ending: The Last Straw

We're talking about Dragon Age 2. Again.

This will be, I think, the fourth review of Bioware's DA 2 on this site alone. I will make my actual review very quick and then get onto the point of this article - constructive criticism. Yes it will be as smug and deluded as it sounds.

So, a very quick review of a game I'm very interested and emotionally-invested in. This sequel tries a lot of new things to break away from the traditional Bioware RPG plot, and for the most part I think it succeeds beautifully. I absolutely love the party-members and Hawke's relationships to them - they really felt more like friends and less like quest companions. I think the linear, framed narrative is restritive but spectacular - balancing emotion, plot and subtle recurring themes and motifs in a way I've never seen in this medium. I was hooked. And the combat - superb. I prefer it over any combat system Bioware have put out before.

However... the setting is very poorly designed and far, far too small. The opening to the game (excluding the framed narrative, I would say) is a confusing, dull, poorly-structured mess. And the ending...... well this is what I want to talk about. It killed the game for me - it's broken, short, rushed, meaningless and involves very little role-play. It is - don't pardon the pun, it's awesome - an abomination.

Seven out of ten, but only just.


But what I wanted to blog about is how easily this game could have been saved. I finished the game yesterday and spent an hour or so yelling at the walls about how I, or any fan, could have written a better ending in a day.

So - in order to calm myself down - here's an idea or two for a more competent ending. I'm not saying I'm about to write anything good here, but I guaruntee it will be better than the final, appropriately-titled quest in Dragon Age 2 - 'The Last Straw'. I'm going to try and make this pretty close to the real ending, except for the very first bit. My spin on the tale begins when....

* Flemeth returns. At the Bone Pit, as soon as the high dragon dies by your hand, another one appears. Your weary party is frightened but determined, and you sigh deeply when the dragon transforms into Flemeth, who laughs haughtily. She warns you that your role as Champion is about to be truly put to the test, and that you will have to strengthen yourself and your principles before the day is done. She slinks off in human form. Returning home, you find Bodhan and Sandal leaving your estate for Orlais. They are pleased to have seen you before they go, and they say their goodbyes, giving you one last chance to enchant, buy and sell. There is a note from Orsino or Merdith, begging you to rush to the Chantry.

* You arrive outside the Chantry, to find Meredith, Orsino and one or two templar bodyguards. The two (who, incidentally, really should have been introduced to the plot in Act 1 or 2) are arguing personally and bitterly. Orsino wants to call out the Reverend Mother. Both are armed and it looks like a duel is about to break out. You attempt to either reason with them or goad one on, but just before the reaction you attempt to foster either dawns or fails, Anders shows up.

* Anders makes a speech about Mages' rights. A good speech. A good speech that lasts more than five seconds and is actually very moving. Hell, maybe his voice cracks. Something soft and kind that makes you weep for the mages no matter what your alignment. And then, Justice appears in his eyes. Anders glows blue and gets pissed off. If you have a friendship you can attempt to calm him down, and if you romanced him, you can try even harder. He falters but doesn't stop yelling. The player starts to realise that the dividing line between Anders and Justice / Vengeance has blurred - you hear them both speaking with one mouth, but they clearly agree. They want blood. If you romanced Anders, there is dialogue explaining how this happenned behind your back. Hawke is either hurt, proud or angry.

* At this, Anders makes his move and performs a spectacular, non-demonic spell which completely destroys the Chantry, including several innocents and the high priest. And the player understands how he did it! For a moment, we let the horror of what has happened sink in, then a crowd slowly begins to arrive. Meredith is understandably enraged (not because of a magic sword but because the Chantry just exploded) and invokes some kind of rite, which would massively reduce the personal freedoms and legal rights of all mages in Kirkwall, some kind of Spanish Inquisition-type affair. Orsino is outraged, refusing to let his people accept responsibility for the actions of a single terrorist, and then goes further to demand that the Templars give up control of the city and grant more freedom to mages. They both argue, loudly, dividing the crowd, both making good points. The Champion's party-members arrive too, one by one, appearing behind Hawke and adding their voices to the row.

* Suddenly, Hawke is forced into a decision. Orsino and Meredith's weapons come out, simultaneously, and the player must leap in to save one of them. Hawke is given a choice of dialogue to make his position clear as he lunges, and give one side his support. The party he sides with is struck, surprisingly, not by his/her opponent but by an anonymous dagger or fireball from the crowd. A riot breaks out - mages, Templars and sympathisers battle, with Aveline's guards vainly attempting to break the fights up. The player fights a group of mages or templars, and the fight moves toward the Gallows, spreading throughout the city as it goes. If Hawke does not have a strong friendship with a party-member who disagrees with his decision (Fenris, Bethany, Carver or Merril, say) then he or she leaves to fight for the other side. Whichever leader you supported, Orsino or Meredith, is seriously injured but alive, and is carried to safety by sympathisers.

* Anders runs, a victorious but broken man - but Varric stops him with an arrow, through the leg, perhaps, or pinning him to the wall if that's not too cliche. Hawke takes a moment to speak with him, and the various party members demand that he should be killed, put to purpose on the team, imprisoned or even allowed to go free. If Hawke has a friendship with him, there is an emotional scene where we realise just how far Anders and Justice have fallen in the pursuit of their goal. If Hawke has romanced him there is a very emotional conflict. Hawke can, if the player is careful, convince Anders to repent, and separate from Justice - OR to convince Justice, now Vengeance, to take the body completely and aid you against either side. You must decide Anders' fate - to come with you and attempt to atone, to come with you and then go to the dungeon / be made tranquil, or to die. If he dies and was romanced, Hawke kisses him before killing him.

* Then there is the inevitable fighting. Hawke and his remaining crew battle their way through hightown, lowtown and the docks before reaching the Gallows. Along the way they mainly fight Templars (not an army of demons) if you sided with the mages, or mages (not an army of bloody demons) if you picked the Templars. Maybe there are even some dialogue choices where you can try to save commoners or something.

* When you reach the Gallows, the first thing you find is more fighting. You fight your way to the base-camp of the side you championed - a massed gang of mages or the bulk of the Templars. With no leader they are scared and outnumbered. Hawke delivers a moving speech - a long one, with several directions the player can take it in - and leads them out of the stronghold. At this point, if a party-member left earlier, s/he returns with a gaggle of mages or Templars in tow. Mirroring the earlier fight with the Arishok, there is a duel. The new enemy fights you, does not go down in three bloody hits like Fenris did for me yesterday, and falls. Then begins a war of words, where Hawke and the beaten companion try to convince one another to join them. Hawke can draw on their past to convince them at the last moment, and s/he dies either as a bitter, betrayed foe or a grateful friend. Then there is more fighting as his/her followers attack. Then there is a little rest where you can speak, one last time, with your party-members. If you have a love interest who is still alive, s/he steps up to kiss you before you go. Bethany or Carver, if they are a friend, apologises to Hawke.

* Finally, Hawke fights the personal guard of either Orsino or Meredith - whoever remains. Orsino absolutely does not suddenly use blood magic, but some of his followers do. There are demons, and they animate the forlorn statues of tortured mages that decorate Kirkwall. If you fight Meredith, the mages on your side animate the staues to fight a vast army of Templars. When all is said and done, there is one more duel. Your opponent, Meredith or Orsino, does not become a monster of any kind, but rather shows a more sympathetic, human side than we have seen from them so far. Between rounds of combat, there is dialogue where you debate the themes of the game. The foe is defeated - either killed or admitting defeat and going into exile. The survivor - Orsino or Meredith - reappears, still wounded. They bitterly regret allowing the conflict to escalate so much, and thank you, offering fabulous rewards. The player chooses whether to accept, granting them the Viscount's crown, or to execute/exile them himself, making himself the new ruler.

* We then return to Varric, who gives a long, long, description of the consequences of all Hawke's decisions to the Seeker. The Ferelden-bred peasant sirrah Hawke has made Kirkwall his home, and truly earned the title 'Champion'. The dark old city-state is now safe from bandits, the Qunari and the Chantry/Circle infighting, thanks to its strong and fair/powerful hero / Viscount.
If the player sided with the mages, then they are granted great freedoms in Kirkwall and eventually Ferelden and beyond - Hawke (and, controversially, Anders) becomes a hero and a new age of magic and co-operation dawns on the Free Marches, the Templars' numbers dwindling.
If the player chose to aid the Templars, then they an the Chantry regain control of Kirkwall and gain strength throughout Thedas. Mages and non-believers are restricted heavily, but a new age of peace dawns. Kirkwall becomes strong and builds an Alliance with Starkhaven. Instances of blood magic and rogue apostates drop sharply, and many lives are saved.
And if the player chose to rule Kirkwall himself, then we get something in the middle. Varric tells the story based on choices and allegiences Hawke made during the game.

And so ends the story of sirrah Hawke and the magic dispute in the Free Marches. The Seeker is surprised and impressed.


Well I feel a lot better now, anyway. Thanks for reading.

If you're slamming a fist on the table and crying, 'Bullshit!' after reading my version, then well... yeah, I hear you. It's just that - the above is genuinely what I expected to happen all the way through the third act. When the real ending came, I was as shocked as I was disappointed.

The reason I had such a negative reaction to this game, or at least the last few hours of it, is simply because I had such a positive view of the middle. I adored about 80% of this game, and I was crushed by that trainwreck of an ending.

The real question is - what would you have done differently? How would you have ended this game, or even begun it? If, like so many people, you felt let-down by Dragon Age 2 - how would you have liked to see that game play out? Do let me know in the comments here, or on the fanfic forum I moderate!

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Oh. And Bioware? I will work for minimum wage if you want me on DA3. Just saying.

Also - this.

First Impressions: Dragon Age: The Calling by David Gaider

What can I say about Lead Writer David Gaider's debut novel, Dragon Age: The Stolen Throne? It was pretty good! There were times when it slumped, and times when it tried to do things that other fantasy novels have done better, but on the whole: I liked the book. It expanded greatly on the lore of Ferelden, introduced some interesting characters, and seemed to act like a true prequel to the video game.

Because of my love of the Dragon Age series, this book was a solid 4 out of 5 to me. But let's talk about the follow-up novel, Dragon Age: The Calling. As one reviewer on Amazon so perfectly put it: While The Stolen Throne tried to do too much in just 400 pages, The Calling doesn't do enough. What happened during the first 100 pages of the first book? War were declared. We get introduced to the Orlais-occupied Ferelden, the heir to the throne, his best friend, and a massive battle breaks out. In the second book? It takes 100 pages to pick up some pendants at the Circle Tower and get to the Deep Roads...maybe a little more than 100 pages, actually.

See...there's no story here. Nothing's happening, nothing's getting resolved. There's a mystery to it all, but it's not enough to drive the relatively lackluster story. Every time this subplot pops up, I get totally interested. It's intriguing, it ties in to a couple of the DA:O add-ons. But then I get sent back into the main storyline, and I start getting bored again.

The characters are surprisingly flat. They remind me of those random party members that would join your Warden in the game: just enough characterization to make you acknowledge them. Even Maric, who was great in the last book, comes off as...stupid? I mean, the fact that he's even in the Deep Roads in the first place is on account of a form of stupidity I can't even fathom. It just doesn't make sense. He tries to justify it A LOT going forward, but it's just never enough. It's actually one of the first times I've ever felt that in a book; I just could not suspend my disbelief. I refused to believe that the King of Ferelden is that much of an idiot.

The saving grace of this book is that it tells Duncan's story, or rather, how he joined the Grey Wardens. Why he was there, and how he acted at that age. It was actually really, really surprising. You see Duncan as this bastion of patience and wisdom in the game. In the book, he's kind of an asshole. He steals shit for no reason, he's cynical to the point of being a douche, and his life lessons are a direct result of his stupidity. This is not how I envisioned Duncan's beginnings. It's not that it doesn't exactly make sense, it's that the story will have to do a lot to sell me on that change in character that must eventually take place.

And finally: What the fuck is with BioWare and the Deep Roads? I have to laugh every single time they send me back there. I thought I had escaped them in the books. The Stolen Throne proved me wrong, and The Calling proved me doubly wrong. There is just nothing significant about the Deep Roads that they've shown so far. There are only so many different variants of "tunnel" and "cave" that you can use to describe them. Halfway through the book, I'm tired of the Deep Roads. I just can't imagine how this opportunity to showcase more of Ferelden was passed upon in order to tell a story in the most uninspired part of the country.

I'm not setting myself up for disappointment next time. I'm fully expecting another trek into the Deep Roads in Dragon Age II. Fully.

As of now, it's getting really difficult to continue on. The story is not progressing, the environment is boring, the characters are not so great because, once again, Gaider has decided to stick to long instances of exposition instead of letting his characters express themselves (one of them doesn't even talk in the first place). There was a bit involving an exchange of stories around a campfire that was really well done, but I know I'm not going to see another moment like that.

In summation: The Calling is pretty boring so far. It seems like a wasted opportunity and a rushed job with very few redeeming features beyond an opportunity to learn about Duncan's youth. Even then, where's Levi Dryden? He claimed that he was instrumental in bringing the Warden's back to Ferelden after the occupation, but he isn't mentioned in the book. It would have been nice to have a little consistency here and a deeper story. Instead, this reads like a 400+ page book that could have very, very easily been told in 200. Maybe 250.

I'll keep trying to get through it, but if I fail: read above once more.

EDIT: I've made it through 3/4ths of the book now, and things picked up substantially. Granted, it took 200 pages before I was truly hooked, but some neat things happened that were definitely worth reading. Not sure how much my rating will change after I finish it, but I'm certainly not as annoyed at this book as I was before!

Writing Sub-Par Fiction Isn't How I Planned On Spending My Twilight Years, Shepard

There comes a point where you just have to say, "Maybe this isn't working out so well." And when I say "You," I totally mean Bioware.

See, Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic is still my favorite game/story ever. I still get excited thinking about it, even five years later. I have a $70 action figure of Darth Revan up on my wall for Christ's sake. And I can still remember the day when I, by chance, figured out that Drew Karpyshyn had been the lead writer on that game. I was so excited: mostly because I subsequently realized he had published some books in the Star Wars universe. This was like...Christmas x 1000 to me.

So, I bought the crazily named Star Wars: Darth Bane: Path of Destruction immediately and began reading. Three chapters later, I sorta stopped. It was nothing like I had expected. There were no memorable characters. No fantastic, clever, and humorous dialogue like I had experienced in KotOR. There was none of that! Only a would-be Sith Lord who can't do anything right except lose. He wins at losing, I guess, which is...confounding.

Long story short: I did eventually finish the book a few months later and...eh, it was okay. It was no Shatterpoint by any means, but it was acceptable. I bought the second book just to see where the series would go from such an odd ending, but I was met by an author's apology and a book that I still have yet to finish to this day.

You'd think after two OKAY Karpyshyn books that I would have stopped there. But I didn't. I bought Mass Effect: Revelation not too long after failing to read the Bane sequel. It got some good reviews on Amazon, but I still don't understand the point of such a short novel, in which the villain isn't introduced until HALFWAY through the book! And the whole thing revolves around Saren and Captain Anderson, who are in Mass Effect: The Game so you know nothing bad happens to them. The book was a mess.

In short, Drew Karpyshyn is still one of the few literary heroes I have, but certainly not for his novels. But I can't exactly blame him. How does one find the time amist his job as Lead Writer for some of the best-reviewed and bestselling games of the decade to write SIX novels?! I don't know, but I would think it involves standing at a crossroad waiting to sell your soul to the devil.

This brings me to David Gaider: someone I never knew existed before the release of Dragon Age: Origins, but I would come to know him as the man behind the dialogue for Carth Onasi in KotOR, which instantly sent him tearing through the ranks of The Most Influential People of My Life. Carth was easily the best character in that game. That's not to demean any of the other characters, but his story of heartbreak and how well he was acted just allowed the game to hit home with me several times over.

After playing through DA:O, I had close to the same feeling I had when KotOR had ended. I felt sad; like I was leaving a world I had come to love behind (and I couldn't go back, explore, and finish my sidequests! Damn you, Bioware!). So, naturally, I was confused, but when I found out David Gaider's role in the game, I quickly downloaded his prequel to the Dragon Age storyline: Dragon Age: The Stolen Throne. This book I found to be much more interesting than Karpy's entries in the Star Wars universe; the characters were actually characterized and I could get a good feel of the world at times. And since it didn't so much rely on the event of the game, it didn't have that restrained feel to it.

I'm almost done with the book, but it still only amounts to an above-average fling. There's so much damn exposition in Gaider's prose that it rival's Karpy's. Neither of them allow their characters to breathe or interact. It's all interior, which gets annoying really quick. I mean...Jesus...these are men who are renowned for writing amazing dialogue, but there's hardly a trace of the stuff in any of these writers' books! C'mon!

I need characters that haven't miraculously gotten themselves into a position to save/enslave the universe. I just want simple adventures of a smaller scale, great characters, and conversations in between that I would actually want to take part in.

To sum this lengthy entry up: this is a plea to Bioware to hire people whose job is to write novels, and write them well. Your Lead Writers are busy writing games that take up days of my life, don't let them talk you into thinking that they can write entire books on the side that won't come out looking rushed or diluted. When Karpy has to put a foreword at the beginning of his novels more-or-less apologizing for the quality of his book...C'mon!

This is Chewbacca! This does not make SEEEENSE!

Look at the monkey!

Anyway, what I wanted to say is that these novels are a great opportunity to expand the much-loved lore of Bioware's games, and I think they need to be taken more seriously. They need to be more than just a side project. They need to be written by hardcore fans of their games that are absolutely drowning in the lore:

i.e. - Myself and Mister Buch, for your consideration.

THE END