Three months ago, Buch and I finished publishing our respective Mass Effect fanfics: New Friends and Broken Angels. It was a fun process and we were both pretty happy with the results. Then, we decided to push our luck.One day, maybe a few weeks afterward, we decided that we would make a collaborative fanfiction story. Sounded like a fantastic idea: to put our awesome mastery over all that is prose to the ultimate test and see if we could crank out a satisfying story without either of us clawing each other's throats out...from across the ocean....I don't know.
We tossed around ideas and we rather quickly decided to write another Mass Effect story while we were still riding the hype and had all the information about the universe in mind. That way, we wouldn't have to do much refreshing. We got started rather quickly with the ideas and discussed what we wanted this story to open with. We decided it would be a Joker and Kaidan story, but not in the way everyone on FF.net wanted it to be. >=O
It was then that we realized that our takes on various scenes were likely to differ, due to our geographical placement in the world:
Me: "Despite their misfortune, the two o' them decided right thar on that stoop that they'd be hoopin' and hollarin' about it later. They'd bring the terr'ists' war to their homeplanet."
Buch: 'Despite all their bally rotten luck, he was certain that the pair of jolly gadabouts would both laugh about it later, over a nice cup of tea and the coverage of the Test match on BBC 2.'
Startling! No?
But we got through it fairly easily and cranked out two prequel stories before we got into the thick of the project. Our approach to it differed in a way, though. Because there was only a small window of time we could discuss the story, and we were both usually busy during that window, we resorted to dividing the chapters of the story equally, writing our respective chapters, and then trading them to edit, add, and put our personal mark on it. This worked very well, despite us constantly rethinking where the story could go.
Not too far into the project, it was becoming clear that the American way of writing and the British way were not as similar as we once thought. There were a great many differences, in fact! And this went beyond simple grammar differences like their underutilization of the letter "Z" (they would spell it, 'underutilisation.' Weird!).
We took some time to discuss a few of these differences, when I was fed up with not knowing what a crumpet was. Buch was kind enough to explain, and though I had a hard time placing it, we discovered that crumpets in America are called by a different name: Thomas' English Muffins. Weird!
The consensus between us was: The fuck?
Then he tells me that's not what a muffin looks like. I respond with a, "Oh, do tell, what's a muffin over there, then?" (Although, not as snarky). And he links me a picture of this, what looks like some sort of puffy bread thing. I tell him that's not a damn muffin, that's a damn biscuit! He refutes the very idea, and I link him a picture of the most scrumptious-looking American muffins, doused in a thick layer of country gravy: biscuits and gravy like so.
Blasphemy! he says. And besides, those aren't even goddamn biscuits.
Like hell, they aren't, I reply. And he shows me a picture of what biscuits are in England! I'm like, those are damn cookies!
Cookies?!
Yeah, cookies!
And we just sat there, both of us pissed off royal at each other's cultures (him more justifyably so, since his country did come first xD). Then we started discussing the finer points of the asari gender debate, and suddenly all of that massive anger went away.
(Just kidding about all the language! Spiced it up for the sake of storytelling, but I'll be damned if that conversation didn't happen.)
And that was just the first time! =O
Edit: Wrote this when I was a bit tired, and I was juggling a lot of links at once. Apologies, Buch, if I pulled the wrong pictures. Was going from memory, which was...deflated...at the time. xD
Has Mr Buch never had a muffin? He's given you a picture of a scone instead. This is a muffin:
ReplyDeletehttp://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8a/Muffin_NIH.jpg
And he can get himself down to the local co-op or come with me to Sainsbury's to verify it because I want a muffin now. Or maybe a scone.
In his biscuit picture, yes two of them are cookies. But a cookie is a biscuit. I have no idea what's going on in your biscuit picture.
Now why won't this comment box let me paste, or even navigate using the arrow keys?
Mr Quick
Adam that's an American muffin, as I call them. Muffins are barm cakes.
ReplyDeleteAnd apparently in America, 'Biscuits and gravy' translates to 'eggs and vomit'.
Only in the South. (which means Southeast) The rest of the country doesn't touch that.
DeleteThus proves that despite English as the official language in america and UK, the geopraphical site and cultures are contrasting.
ReplyDeleteI'm still stuggling half the time at differnacing with the word jelly and jam.
Speaking of that, I've heard that you British people like to have your beer warm? Well over here in Australia most of us like it cold no matter what season.
This warm beer thing is a myth! We like our lager cold as possible. Ales and things like that though are sometimes served warm. But usually cold - it's a myth. I was saying to Knight yesterday that Australia is somewhere in the middle of our two cultures in terms of language.
ReplyDeleteOver here, jam isthe thick, sugary stuff on toast - like a preserve, and jelly is what we call jell-o.
I thouht of another one. We call 'Where's Waldo?' books 'Where's Wally?'
ReplyDeleteYou've taken "Waldo" from us now?! Fuming rage, Buch! Fuming rage!
ReplyDeletexD
To Mr. Buch:
ReplyDeleteWhat about crackers? Do people in the U.K. know what crackers are? I'm asking because I've been watching a YouTuber from the U.K. named Graham. He said everyone has a hard time understanding his name when he tells someone over the phone. I told him to refer to the cracker, as in graham crackers. What say ye?
To Knightfall:
I LOL'd throughout your entire post. By that I mean, I cackled so loudly I alarmed the neighbors. =D